After coming home late-ish from a meeting with the Party Planning Committee, I OVERSLEPT. I overslept when I had the morning off and could have potentially parked in front of CNN and consumed all of this history in one deliciously livestreaming moment.
Dammit. I’m kicking myself in the shins for this one.
Anyway, at least I’ve found the full text. (Haven’t located a reliable source for a re-run yet.) Said one particularly lovable bear, “i havent been that emotional since the ending of harry potter 7.”
On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.
On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics.
We remain a young nation, but in the words of Scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.
In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of short-cuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted – for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things – some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labor, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.
Can I have Jon Favreau’s babies? Jon Favreau, will you make hot Eurasian babies with me?
Former Gawkerer and Radarer Alex Balk “live tweeted” the event.
And San Francisco has “renamed” Bush Street in exchange for He Who is PRESIDENT and Black.
Also, if you don’t find this funny, YOU NEED TO PULL THAT STICK OUT OF YOUR ASS.