Preamble at the end.
Name: Mayka Mei
Nickname: …Mumma? To be clear, only one person and one dog may call me that. You don’t get to.
My parents were: My mother’s maiden name isn’t in the password to any of my Internet accounts, but I’m still moving on from this question.
You’re named after: Next.
The household you grew up in: was ostentatious.
The last time you cried: June sixteenth, 2020, when I learned about the game “Hit the N*gger Baby.” That messed me up for days.
Do you like your handwriting? Nah. It’s efficient, not aesthetic.
Would you kiss the last person you kissed again? 💯
What were you doing three hours ago? Dinner with my loves!
If you were another person, would you be friends with you? This version? Yes. High School Me and College Me only at certain times.
Side Note: I’ve made three friends during quarantine and I am even more shocked than you are!
Do you use sarcasm a lot? Is there such a thing as a non-smartass response to this? Of course I do. Not. That was sarcastic. Not. What is this?…
Do you still have your tonsils? Yes.
Would you ever bungee jump? HELL YES, although, what I really want to do is basejumping.
Have you had sex today? Hi, I don’t know who is going to read this.
What is your favorite cereal? Panda Puffs! Available from Thrive!
Do you untie your shoes before you take them off? What do you take me for, some kind of animal?
What is your favorite ice cream? Wanderlust Creamery‘s curbside delivery is getting me through lockdown. (They made boba that doesn’t get weird in the ice cream!) I miss walking to Bi-Rite for Lavender Earl Grey Pretention. (I know that’s not a word.) Salt & Straw‘s roasted strawberry and coconut milk sorbet was the first time I bought an artisanal pint. But if we’re talking freezer section, Ben & Jerry’s Phish Food. I used to eat it BY THE PINT because to me that was “one serving.” This same line of thinking also led to my one edible story. I still don’t read nutritional information. I’m a mother. Moving on.
What is the first thing you notice about people? Probably their clothes. Obviously and unapologetically.
What is your least favorite thing about yourself? My insecurities! We’re in quarantine and I’m not seeing anybody outside of my family, so my physical self is absolutely perfect.
Who do you miss the most? I don’t even know where to start with this. Obama?
What are you listening to right now? For my daughter, “Puff the Magic Dragon.” For me, the Blindspotting soundtrack(s) because 2018 was a wash with cloth diapers (HAH.) and I didn’t watch it until twice this week.
What are your favorite smells? Lavender. Keep it simple.
Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? Birthday wishesss! Thank you!
Mountain hideaway or beach house? I refuse to choose.
Favorite sport to watch? Gymnastics. Snowboarding. Non-American football. And have I mentioned basejumping?
Favorite food? Lots of things but always carbs.
The last movie you watched: I Used to Go Here
What color shirt are you wearing? Black.
Summer or winter? Summer – but not wildfire-hot, just pre-climate change summer-hot.
Hugs or kisses? …neither. Even before COVID-19, neither. Thanks for asking and not pressuring me!
Computer or television? Computervision. It’s all the same now, isn’t it?
What book are you reading right now? The Magic Years: Understanding and Handling the Problems of Early Childhood by Selma H. Fraiberg, which has been like reading a textbook. But I’ve got an irrational completion compulsion, so I’ve got to finish it or else I’ll fail my kid.
Favorite sound? If music is off-limits, I love the sound of clopping on stones. (I can hear The Red Balloon in my head on-demand.)
Have you ever ridden in an ambulance? No.
Do you play any musical instruments? I’m an ex-violinist.
Are you afraid of the dark? No.
If you could wish for one thing, any thing you ever wanted, what would it be? A Magic Eraser for key political players active in the last four years.
I used to write a lot. I fell out of practice when I got out of working in social media (where the outwitting is nonstop [And now I check my Facebook account, like, maybe once a week. It’s better here. Join us!]) This is a baby step to get back into the practice. Questions from Samantha Irby‘s essay, “Awkward First Date,” from Meaty. Remember when you would answer a bunch of questions and email them out in hopes that your crush would read them? Chain letters – thank you! You didn’t win over my crushes, but you were fun.
The Maykazine 